6 months ago, I traded in my pina colada for just plain ol coconut water and I have honestly never been happier.
I stopped drinking alcohol for the same reason I quit my career in medicine: I decided to start listening to my intuition. Even if I don’t understand WHY it’s telling me to do something. Even if it’s hard. Even if it goes against the grain and popular opinion.
Ever since I made the decision to leave medicine in November of 2018, I started feeling a nudge to stop drinking. But at that time in my life, it seemed too hard. I was already giving up and changing so much about my life and my ego longed for something to stay the same.
It longed for some type of comfort zone, because that is what alcohol was to me. It was a way to stay in my comfort zone and to keep things status quo.
So for the next year, I continued to drink. But as I dove deep into my personal growth journey, everything started to change, including my relationship with alcohol.
Drinking wasn’t fun or carefree anymore. With each night I went out with friends and with each hangover the next day, I started to realize more and more that I couldn’t keep living like this. Drinking seemed to have more consequences now. The brain fog started to seem worse than ever before. The guilt and shame I experienced after a night out seemed to intensify.
Finally on November 22, 2019, I had enough and made the decision to stop drinking alcohol entirely.
I went to my sister’s wedding, entirely sober. I celebrated new years even in a foreign country, alcohol free. I solo traveled around Taiwan, stayed in hostels and socialized with other backpackers without the booze. I go on sober tinder dates.
Each day that passes, I surprise myself by doing more and more things I never thought I could do sober. And I know that, 6 months in, this is just the beginning. In my post today, to celebrate my 6 months sober-versary, I want to share you with my 3 favorite benefits so far of embracing this alcohol free lifestyle.
#1 I am NEVER hungover
I’m not going to lie, this part is freaking amazing. Going for 6 full months without those dreaded hangovers is life changing enough on its own.
I never feel that slight brain fog lingering over me the next day (or two). I never feel nauseous. I never feel that exhausted, but wired sleep deprivation that follows a night of boozing. I no longer wake up the next morning with heart palpitations and regret, and I no longer suffer from severe cases of hangxiety.
I am never “too hungover” to go on adventures or get some work done the day after a big night out. I don’t have to strategically plan to take the entire next day off to accomodate for my inevitable hangover.
That doesn’t mean I work everyday, but what it DOES mean is that I can actually enjoy my days off. Instead of feeling like I’m only half alive and spending the entire day trying to chug gatorade and nibble on crackers to revive myself, I can just REST.
Back when I was drinking, I was very much living in a state of perpetual hustle and subscribed to the work hard play hard mentality.
I honestly think I used to get hungover on purpose so that I could take a whole day off. As a way to force myself to lay around and do nothing for the day. But guess what…. now I realize, I don’t have to be hungover to do that.
Now I just give myself days off because I deserve them and I end up enjoying these off days much more than I ever enjoyed my hangovers.
Not suffering from hangovers is also my productivity super power. I am no longer killing my brain cells on a regular basis and as such I never feel dulled or foggy the next day. Since I spend less time recovering, I can spend more time on my business, actually creating content and spreading my message to the world.
I used to think that no longer having hangovers would be the main motivation to stop drinking. That the reason I needed to stop drinking was because I was “losing time” hungover. It was a purely productivity focused stance.
And yes, 6 months without a hangover has been pure bliss, But not drinking has given me so much more than that.
#2 Beyonce level confidence
I used to think I needed alcohol to have fun, to BE fun. I thought I needed it in social situations because it was supposed to be a social lubricant. I didn’t think I could be as social, funny, or friendly without alcohol.
With this mentality, I usually thought I needed to be already tipsy before social events even began, which led me to pregame so I could be in prime form once I got to the social event.
I didn’t realize how much this was eroding my own confidence and self esteem. How relying on something outside of me was sending myself a message that I wasn’t good enough on my own.
I didn’t think I could show up as myself, but instead thought I needed to be in a certain state of mind so I could be fun enough or cool enough. I couldn’t just be me, I needed to put on a mask to be accepted.
Of course, I had no idea I was doing this, but once I stopped drinking I was able to investigate and untangle all of these patterns. I started to analyze all the reasons I was using alcohol in the first place and what I thought it was giving me. I began to see with crystal clarity the way I was using alcohol as a crutch to become someone I wasn’t.
Now, each time I go out to social events without drinking, I prove to myself that I AM in fact good enough, fun enough, funny enough, and social enough exactly as I am. I can be all of those things on my own without any external substance. And not relying on something like that outside of yourself is SO. Freaking. Empowering.
#3 Deeper, more meaningful connections
In my drinking days, I always gravitated towards becoming friends with people who were also moderate to heavy social drinkers. People who would take shots with me. People who would go back up to the bar with me multiple times throughout the night. People I didn’t have to be self conscious around because we were all “drinking to get drunk” and on the same level.
These connections were superficial by nature, because they were based on a mind-altering substance. I thought we were bonding by drinking together and sharing our secrets, but really we didn’t always remember the conversations the next day or maybe we woke up feeling embarrassed by the things we said or how much we shared.
Not only were the friendships themselves superficial, but I was never really present enough to establish real connections.
While I was out at social gatherings, many times I was preoccupied by my drive to get drunk. I would be smiling and nodding along in the conversation, but mentally would be fixated on getting my next drink. Wondering “is it too early to get another drink?” “will people judge me if I go ahead and get another one?” “Ahh screw it I’m gonna go ahead and get one.”
I was so busy with my own internal dialogue that I wasn’t able to be as present in the conversation. Trying to achieve the “optimal level of drunkenness” was such a mentally consuming endeavor that took careful assessment and calculations and prevented me from being available for genuine connection.
Now, I get to approach social gatherings SO differently. I usually gravitate towards longer, deeper conversations with one or two people. I listen. Actively. And I am so much more present and engaged in the moment because there are no alcohol-related quandaries to take my mind off the conversation. I don’t have to take 1000 trips to the bathroom or keep excusing myself to go back to the bar. Also, the next day I am also not consumed by getting reassurances that “I acted appropriately”, and just overall have more space and capacity to be a better friend and human being.
It is hard to articulate all the ways my life has changed as a result of giving up alcohol, but I can honestly tell you it has absolutely changed for the better.
I’m sure this is just the beginning and that the benefits are going to keep rolling in. I really think of sobriety as one of my superpowers now and the gift that keeps on giving.
So if you are starting to question your drinking or wonder if alcohol is really serving you anymore- then I challenge you to take a little break. Start with just 30 days and see how incredible you feel. You may just never want to go back.
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