One mistake preventing you from finding work you love

When we are stuck in unfulfilling jobs and are feeling that tug towards something more, we can feel lost, confused and overwhelmed. We can have that sense of not knowing where to start. 

Have you ever felt like that?

Like you just haven’t figured out what excites you in life that is worth pursuing?

That you are missing a purpose, but you have no idea how to find it?

Maybe you are starting to come to terms with the fact that you absolutely cannot stay in your current job, but you don’t know what your next job would be. You don’t know what kind of work you would want to do instead, or what’s even realistic or possible.

Maybe you want to do something else but you have no idea what that something else would look like. You are trying to solve for x, but you don’t even know your y value. It feels like an impossible puzzle.

Maybe you have several different hobbies you enjoy or a few interests you’d like to explore, but you don’t know where to focus your efforts and energy.

And when we feel lost and confused many of us make the mistake of turning to the external world for answers. That is what we have been conditioned to do. To look outside of ourselves.

I was totally guilty of this when I was trying to claw my way out of medicine. I was obsessed with figuring out my options. I wanted to know what kinds of other jobs were out there. 

I became a google queen.

I spent so much time trolling the internet asking questions like “how can you make money online?” and “how to become a freelance copywriter?” and “what jobs can you get if you have a medical degree but quit residency?” 

I spent hours browsing remote job boards. I planned out my whole career as a travel influencer. I bought online courses to learn how to become a copywriter, a travel blogger, and then an English teacher. 

I thought having all the information would help me make a decision. That the more I knew, the easier it would be to figure out what I wanted to do.

But honestly, the more information I gathered, the more lost I felt.

I was so busy looking for the answers OUT THERE, but that isn’t where the answers are. The answers are not outside of us. The answers are not on google or in reddit forums or with your parents or coworkers or best friends.

The answers are inside of us.

Maybe you are rolling your eyes. Maybe all of this sounds cheesy AF.

But it’s so. freaking. true.

The biggest mistake we can make when trying to find work we love is looking outside of ourselves for the answers. We must look inside of ourselves.

Do you do this? How do you look outside of yourself for answers? Do you try to poll your friends and family members asking them what you should do? Do you message strangers on Instagram asking them how they got to where they are? Do you get lost in a google rabbit hole like I did, hoping desperately that the answers will just appear? That someone will just tell you what to do?

It’s easy to do. It’s easy to look to the external word for answers. But I have another approach for you.

If you are stuck in an unfulfilling job and you feel lost.

If you feel like you don’t know where to start with your career change and don’t know what job is next.

Start within. Start by looking inside of yourself.

No one else knows YOUR answers. No one else knows YOUR path. No one else can tell you what to do.

The simplest way to start looking within, is to give yourself space and silence.

We live in a time where there is not much room for silence anymore. We are constantly inundated with texts, emails and other social media notifications. We fill every spare moment of silence with music, or podcasts, or busyness.

When we are constantly consuming there is not space for clarity. It is only in the silence that we can access our inner knowing. It is only in the silence that we can have space to think. Space for things to bubble to the surface that we’ve been ignoring for so long.

Maybe you will be surprised at what comes up for you, maybe it’s something you’ve known all along.

One of my clients started driving to work in silence, and in that 45 minute commute she realized that she has always wanted to be a writer. She suppressed this desire for so long because it wasn’t a practical career. But in the silence it came up. Since then she started writing a book and is now also going back to school for creative writing.

When I was trying to decide if I should quit my career in medicine, I gave myself space and silence. I solo hiked and road tripped around Utah. Mostly in silence. On the plane ride back to the East coast I continued the silence and finally had my clarity break through. I realized I could not go back to medicine. Although I didn’t know exactly what I would do instead, I made my decision not to return trusting that the rest of my path would illuminate.

So where in your life can you create silence? Where can you create space to reflect?

It could be through starting a 15 minute meditation and journaling practice right when you wake up. It could be going for a walk in nature or driving to work without any music, podcasts or phone conversations. It could be taking a bubble bath in total silence or putting your phone in a drawer for a day and taking a digital detox.

My recommendation is spending at least 15 minutes every day for one week to start to cultivate that clarity. The longer you spend in silence, the faster the clarity will come.

There are so many answers and so much clarity inside of you, if you only give yourself space and open yourself up to receiving.


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