People generally come to me because they are feeling unhappy in their current job. I use the purposefully vague term “unhappy” as a way to group together a huge range of symptoms because unhappiness can show up in many different ways for different people.

It could be that you feel burnt out or exhausted. That you come home at the end of the work day feeling mentally drained, like you have nothing else to give.

It could show up as this feeling of wanting MORE that is hard to articulate.

You could feel overworked, undervalued or like you are just going through the motions to get a paycheck and go home.

Whatever it is, usually people come to me when they feel like something is “off” in their career”.

And the first thing I try to figure out is…. WHY? Why are you unhappy?

Most of us have a lot of reasons that we think are contributing to our unhappiness at work.

Things like “the hours are too long” or “I’m not getting paid enough” or “the job is too stressful”, or “the patients are just not appreciative.

And all of those reasons are probably true.

But I don’t think they are the full story.

Those are the surface level reasons that you are unhappy, but usually the truth about WHY you are feeling discontent in your career run a bit deeper than that.

Let’s explore 3 common reasons that you might be unhappy in your career.

#1 You are not using your gifts and strengths.

We all have certain gifts and talents that we are meant to share with the world in some capacity, and when we aren’t using these… we suffer.

There is a quote from the bible that speaks to this truth.

“If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you.”

A huge reason that many of us are unhappy in our careers is because we are not bringing forth what is within us.

We are not tapping into our gifts and talents, and that is slowly destroying us.

Let me share an example from my story.

One of my gifts comes out in deep conversations. I’m still figuring out how best to articulate and explain it, but here’s what I’ve got so far. It involves holding a space for people to be seen, and heard. Asking them questions to help them go really deep and have certain insights about themselves and their life that they have never experienced before.

Basically, I can help people find the truth within them and use that truth to recalibrate their lives. I’m not going to lie, it’s pretty incredible.

But when I was working in medicine, I was not really using this particular gift of mine and I believe that is a huge reason that I was so unhappy.

I constantly felt rushed from one patient encounter to the next. Efficiency and productivity were valued above all else. When I had a patient who came in with a more invisible illness like “chronic pelvic pain”, I immediately became so frustrated. Not with the patient, but with the system, because I felt unable to do what was right for the patient and what I was best at.

Because of the short time allotted for clinic visits, I wasn’t able to give them my time, my full attention and hold space for them to go deep and get to the root of their pain. Studies have shown that there is a significant association between sexual abuse early in life and the later development of chronic pelvic pain.

Each time I simply ordered an ultrasound or prescribed birth control instead of taking the time to support and understand the patient emotionally, a little part of me died.

It wasn’t just that there was more that could be done for the patient, although that definitely weighed on me. It was also the fact that I wasn’t doing what I was best at to serve them. I felt this longing of… I wish I had more time to actually sit down and talk with you. To get to the heart of what was going on.

This is what it feels like to not use your gifts and talents. It feels like a heaviness. You start to feel this sense of disappointment in yourself, in your work, and in your potential to leave a legacy. Gay Hendricks, author of The Big Leap describes the sensation as “rusting from the inside out”.

Not using your gifts and talents to serve the world is a huge cause for discontent and unhappiness in your career. In my program, The Career Fulfillment Formula, one of the things we do is identify “your uniqueness”. We get really clear on those special gifts and talents that only YOU have. Those gifts that are meant to be given, to be shared with the world. We make a plan for you to bring forth what is within you, so what is within you can save you (and can help others in the process!).

#2. The work is violating some of your core values.

Another reason for unhappiness in your career is that your work is violating some of your core values. Our core values are what we hold to be most important.

They drive our behavior, they motivate us, they are our reason for living, for getting out of bed in the morning. Our core values are what our soul wants on the deepest level. Knowing our core values can help us to make decisions about where we want to spend our precious time and energy in a way that will be most satisfying to us.

But if you work is causing you to constantly violate your core values, over time the discontent and resentment will build.

For example if one of your core values is family, that probably means spending your time and devoting your energy to your family is highly important to you. However, if the work you are doing gets in the way of the time you spend with your family to a level that is not acceptable to you, it’s going to feel bad over time. If you have to constantly work weekends for your job and miss out on going to your son’s soccer games, or if you aren’t able to pick your kids up from school because of your unpredictable call schedule…. that feels crappy.

If your job is so stressful that you are constantly distracted and don’t feel you can be mentally present with your family even when you are physically there… this also impacts you. Each time you have to sacrifice something that feels important to you for your work you become aggravated and frustrated.

It may not feel like a big deal at first, but it builds up over time. Every moment that you choose to spend your time and energy in a way that doesn’t align with your values, it causes discontent.

Unease.

Basically, it feels bad.

But learning how to align your work with your values brings a sense of peace, contentment, and satisfaction. In week 5 of my program, The Career Fulfillment Formula, I walk my clients through a values elicitation exercise. The insights and aha moments that come out of this week alone, are life-changing. One of my clients got so much out of doing this she said “this exercise should be done with everyone who graduates high school and continued regularly”.

When we get super clear on what is truly important to us, it is easier to make decisions about how we spend our time and energy. We are able to see more clearly why our current career isn’t working for us, and how we can move towards a career path that matches up with our core values.

#3 You don’t enjoy the tasks of your job

This may sound obvious. You might be rolling your eyes at this and saying…. “Well duh, If you don’t enjoy the tasks of your job, of course you are going to be unhappy”.

But stay with me for a moment and let’s break this down a bit because I think you will find this distinction helpful.

For every job, every career there is the expectations vs. reality conundrum. There is the way our job is portrayed on TV and there are the day to day realities of the work.

Being a lawyer is not always the sweet taste of victory when you are putting a serial killer behind bars.

Being a police officer is not always the thrill of a high speed car chase.

There is the 20,000 ft zoomed out version of the profession. There’s the “I want to be a doctor, I want to save lives” version, and then there is the day to day reality of sorting through your inbox on Epic checking lab results.

This is the same with parenting (Although I’ve never been a parent, so it’s possible that this is nothing like parenting and then you can ignore this analogy all together). There’s the “I want to be a mom and raise a child” and there’s the day to day reality of wiping noses and changing diapers.

You don’t have to love every moment, but if you can’t find an ounce of joy in the daily tasks, it’s likely you will be unhappy most of the time.

I believe that in order to be happy in a job it’s important to understand what the job really consists of, on a moment to moment basis.

What are the tasks? What is the minutia? What will you actually be spending your minutes and hours doing?

The tasks don’t need to be glamorous for you to enjoy them. But if you want to enjoy your work, it will be important for you find some joy in the little daily tasks.

In my work as a coach, there are day to day realities that may not be the most exciting.

There is writing blog posts, reaching out to people in the DMs, creating and analyzing my marketing strategy, setting up back end systems, determining how to best invoice and create contracts for my clients, writing emails, etc.

It is not super thrilling stuff.

But honestly, even when it’s not my “life’s work”, and even when it’s something I will ultimately be delegating, I don’t mind any of these tasks.

I enjoy learning about the ins and outs of running an online business. I feel satisfied when creating a beautiful graphic on Canva. I get into a flow when writing captions for Instagram.

So it is important to ask yourself, do you enjoy the IDEA of your job, or do you enjoy the REALITY of your job.

If you don’t enjoy the day-to-day tasks and the way you are spending your time, that could be a huge piece of why you are unhappy in your career.

In The Career Fulfillment Formula, we spend week 6 getting in touch with what you enjoy. We connect back to what you liked to do when you were younger, what kind of things make you happy, and what makes the time fly by. Once we understand what brings you joy, we brainstorm on what kind of career would incorporate more of that in your day-to-day tasks.

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So when you think about why you are unhappy in your current job, do any of these reasons resonate with you?

Are you using your gifts and talents at work?

Are you doing work that aligns with your core values?

Do you enjoy the day to day tasks that come along with your job?

If any of these areas are off, that could explain why you feeling unhappy. Once you understand and can identify what the problem is, you are that much closer to finding a solution.

If you would like some support around identifying why you are unhappy in your career and making the necessary changes to find fulfillment, click here to book a discovery call with me.

And I would absolutely love to hear from you as well!

Comment below and let me know why you think you are unhappy in your career!