It’s been a little over two years since I quit my residency. Two years since I made that drastic decision to walk away from the traditional career path of medicine and pursue success and happiness on my own terms.
Maybe you are wondering…. how is that working out for me? How am I feeling about my decision and my life two years later? What is my new life like and how does it compare to my life in medicine?
After some reflection, I came up with eight major ways that my life is better NOW after leaving medicine.
#1 Better Sleep
In residency with the long working hours and stress of the hospital, it felt impossible to get my necessary 8 hours in every night. I was lucky to get 5 or 6 hours of sleep on most nights.
Because of my sleep deprivation, my mental health suffered big time. I was crankier, more easily irritated and quicker to tears about minor frustrations. I constantly felt drained and exhausted, like a shell of a person.
Now, I get a full 8 hours of quality sleep almost every night and because of that I wake up feeling well rested. My mood is much more stable and positive. I have the energy to get my work done efficiently and show up as a decent human being (more on this next). I cannot emphasize enough how much of a difference a good night’s sleep makes in the quality of my everyday life.
#2 Better Relationships
When I was working in medicine, I wanted to be a good friend, daughter and sister, but it felt impossible. I felt like I was just barely making it through the day; I rarely had the wherewithal to show up as the best version of myself to the people around me.
I was so consumed in my own exhaustion and misery, that I didn’t have the time or energy to make space for the important people in my life. I would rush through phone calls with my mom, ignore texts from friends and generally just keep myself pretty isolated.
Now, I have the capacity to be a better daughter, sister and friend. I am able to send people “thinking of you” texts, stay in touch more regularly, and have longer, deeper conversations with the people I care about. I am more present in my relationships and therefore feel a greater sense of fulfillment and satisfaction. I feel more connected to the people and the world around me.
#3 Leaning into my emotions
When I was working in medicine, I never learned how to deal with my emotions. In my experience, the general sentiment in medicine is that emotions are inconvenient and a waste of time. It’s not that emotions themselves were demonized, it’s more that we didn’t have the TIME to deal with difficult feelings.
During my first year of residency, I went through a breakup while I was on night shift. I didn’t get to take any time to process my feelings. I had to continue to show up 5 days a week for 12-15 hour shifts. There was no time for tears; we had babies to deliver.
I never learned to feel my emotions, instead I learned how to suppress them. I learned how to effectively numb out with alcohol, busyness and Netflix.
But as Brene Brown says, you can’t selectively numb. When you numb the bad, you also numb the good. By not feeling the difficult emotions, I was also blunting my ability to experience the good ones like love, joy and fulfillment.
It’s taken me a while, but I’m finally starting to thaw out. Now, I’m learning how to deal with difficult emotions like rejection, heartache, loneliness and sadness. I’m learning strategies to feel, process and move through these emotions, so they don’t get trapped inside of me.
Although, I’ve probably shed more tears the past two years than ever before, each tear feels like a true release. Plus, exploring and developing my emotional capacity has made me feel more alive. I feel the whole spectrum of human emotions and there is so much beauty and power that comes with that gift.
#4 Spending More Time In My Happy Places
In medicine, I quickly realized the hospital was not one of my happy places. I didn’t enjoy the high tension and stress which made me constantly feel on high-alert. I didn’t like the fluorescent lights or how it was always freezing cold in the OR. It was hard to explain exactly why, but I always felt a little bit like my soul was dying or wasting away in the hospital. I would spend most of my day counting down the hours until I could get in my car and get home!
What I’ve come to learn is that environment can play a huge role in your level of happiness. If you don’t like where you spend most of your time, that matters.
Now, I get to spend most of my time in my happy places. The places where I feel more at peace. In the coziness of a coffee shop, working on my laptop. Outside in nature hiking new trails or walking around parks. Or in the comfort of my home, taking calls from the couch in my sweatpants.
Spending time in environments you enjoy is important for your well being. Being in the hospital was not my happy place and now I’m so lucky that I get to spend so much more time in my happy places. That makes for a much happier Chelsea.
#5 Using My Creativity More
The medical field is not exactly the place for creativity. It’s more of a place for following evidence based practices, protocols and algorithms. It’s important to follow these things because that’s how you know you are providing quality care. You don’t want a rogue doctor who is making up antibiotic regimens and inventing surgical techniques on the fly. That is definitely not ideal.
I completely understand the importance for science, data and protocols in the medical field. However, I didn’t realize how much my creativity was stifled in that environment and how much I enjoy using my creativity.
I’ve learned that I love writing. I love the process of developing ideas and putting language to them. The magic of stringing words together to tell a story either in my blog posts or IG captions. The feeling of inspiration when I’m in the flow and ideas just keep coming to me.
I love creating my own processes in my business and designing my own systems that work for me. I love putting all my coaching knowledge and life experiences together in a way to create a workshop, a free challenge or an entire coaching program.
Using my creativity to make content that helps people, is such a deeply satisfying experience that has added so much richness to my life.
#6 Flexibility to create my own schedule
In medicine, I quickly began to feel resentful with the time commitment required of me. I was assigned specific hours and shifts and didn’t have any control over when I was expected to be at work. I would have to miss out on parties, concerts, hiking trips and casual hang outs with friends. Getting off work for a whole weekend to attend out of town weddings or bachelorette parties was almost impossible.
I missed out on so many things I wanted to do and that made me so resentful.
Now, I get to decide WHEN I work, and how much. Besides my client call times, there is no specific schedule I have to follow. If a friend invites me to go on a hiking trip or a weekend away, I can intentionally put in extra hours in advance to get all my work done. I feel in charge of my schedule and I don’t have to miss out on anything unless I choose to. Sometimes I want to stay home for a whole weekend working on things for my business, but it’s all my choice. No one else is forcing me to do anything. Yes, it requires more self-discipline, but that is a trade off I am more than happy to make.
#7 More time
When I was working in medicine, I never had enough TIME to do anything. Because I spent so many hours of the day working, my free time felt so squashed and limited. There was barely enough hours in the day to get sufficient sleep, clean the apartment, go grocery shopping and just do all the basic survival and adulting stuff. Having to do any little errand like renewing my driver’s license seemed like a massive inconvenience because I didn’t have time for things like that.
Now time has opened up for me in the most beautiful way. There is such an abundance of time to do all the things I want to do and I’m so grateful. There’s more time to read allll the books I want to. More time to go hiking and traveling and adventuring. More time to spend with my friends. More time to lay around and do nothing. More time to sleep. More time to goof off and do things that are not at all productive.
More time to do the things that make my life truly meaningful.
#8 More Fulfilling Work
While I was working in medicine, I was definitely doing important work. I was taking care of pregnant patients, helping bring life into the world, counseling people to choose the right birth control for their lifestyle so they could avoid unintended pregnancies.
I was definitely making an impact, but I often felt disconnected or removed from that impact. I would see a patient in clinic once, and then never get to follow up with them because I moved on to the next rotation. There were also many barriers within the healthcare system to providing good quality care to patients. There were the competing interests of hospital administration, insurance companies, and concerns about malpractice. All of which served to complicate each decision and sometimes got in the way of what was best for the patient.
Now as a coach, I feel that the impact I am making is more personally satisfying to me. I get the continuity to witness each client’s journey from beginning to end. Additionally, there are no barriers to service. As an entrepreneur, I get to be fully responsible for my clients’ experiences from the moment they come in contact with me. There are no outside forces that get in the way of me providing high quality service to my clients. That feeling of full responsibility and the way I get to be a part of the whole journey are just a few of the things that make this work so personally meaningful to me.
So if you are wondering what life is like after medicine, I hope this list gave you some ideas.
Honestly, I could not be happier with my decision and the way life has unfolded for me ever since I got up the courage to quit residency and leave my medical career forever.
If you are struggling in the medical field and wanting to find your way out; I hope my story serves as an inspiration. If I can find my way out of medicine and into happiness, it is absolutely possible for you too. There is a much happier, richer life waiting for you if you are brave enough to seize it.
XO, Coach Chels
